Thursday, February 11, 2010

Notes from Nathan: I hate Adam!

Sex and the internet have intertwined so much that, its almost the equivalent to ordering pizza for delivery.  My internet rendezvous started when AOL chat rooms were popular.  It was simple.  You created a profile that included a few details about yourself, uploaded a few photos and waited for someone to respond.  Initially, I liked the idea of creating an alias.  It wasn't until later in my life that I grew to despise men living with fictitious stats, namely their health status.

I developed a love/hate relationship with online hook ups.  When I was hot, I was hot and when I was not, I was not.  There were times, I admit, that I had several 'connections' in one week, hell on occasion, in one night!  It ultimately depended on how close one lived in proximity to the prowling freaks and night crawlers.

In 2010, I have a considerable amount of hate for the #1 website for online hook ups, adam4adam.  One Saturday afternoon, I found myself scrolling through the various profiles and was astounded at what I found.  First of all, when I visited Harlem Central, I stumbled across a number of recognizable faces from my club promoter days.  Bottoms posing as tops, positives posing as negatives and the most gut wrenching ESCORTS!  I actually knew some of them. Men telling lies on top of lies regarding their body types and ages.  Hardly anyone is interested in hooking up with fats or fems.  We have a vast segment of the population that posts pictures of themselves that are over two years old and poor representations of who or what will appear at your front door.  Lies.  Many fems post images of themselves in their urban athletic drag.  It is your typical baggy jeans, doo rags and baseball caps.  Ultimately if it’s just a hook up, how will anyone know that you connected with a fem anyway?  Sex is sex.

I became most alarmed when I sent messages to people that I knew were HIV+ (now I know why people keep this information to themselves) and they were open to having unprotected sex with me.  Now mind you I was doing research, so no I wasn't using real pictures of myself.  This made me no better than the next, but I need validation to prove my point.  There was one 'friend' in particular who was not only willing to fuck raw, but it stated nowhere in his profile that he was positive.  Sure, we have been told to assume that EVERYONE is positive, but I'm not so sure the average mind can trick themselves into doing so, especially when the hosting party looks healthier than most crackheads.

Over the course of the years, I must have had about eight different screen names leaving me virtually untraceable.  It saddened me because that meant that I wasn't the only one who could leave without a trace.  This screams volumes when it comes to men and our lack of responsibility.  Its no wonder men get women pregnant and leave.  Its no wonder men infect other men and leave.  What is there to be responsible for after the nut is bust?  Nothing.  Its YOUR problem now, I got mine.

In my humble opinion, its too late to try to educate men over thirty.  Far too many of us are set in our ways.  We have had to do as others have told us for far too many years before claiming our own independence, so why would we listen to anyone now?

Sadly, yes we will all die someday, but until we put a stop to the online cess pools of 'anything goes' sex, our death will be wrapped or should I say unwrapped in a nice little package. THERE IS NO CURE!

And to think adam, the first known man has to share the namesake of this God-forbidden website.  So now what?  You've got mail.



DovieLee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

See, this is what's wrong when self-proclaimed experts on everything get their own blogs.

Just because you weren't mature enough to understand that A4A is just about sex and nothing more, doesn't mean that the rest of us aren't. If you know ahead of time that this is just a booty call, and we're all adults here, and all you want and need is a quick nut, then you can use A4A responsibly (including practicing safe sex at all times, regardless of the true status of the other person).

But naive girls like you go in apparently looking for love and sex or love or sex or just sex sometimes but deep down you want love, or whatever, then get slapped upside the head when you realize the site is full of guys who only want sex. Duh!

Anonymous said...


I would say just dont cruise those sites if it is not ur current cup of tea or ur level right now.




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