Saturday, March 6, 2010

Zolra's Corner: My Responsibility For My LGBT Family

Today's column is going to be much deeper than any other column I've ever written. Right after watching this video on Youtube, everything I wanted to talk about tonight started flowing. Watching this video made me think about my LGBT family.

Months ago, I have made two important decisions in my life regarding the LGBT community, I might as well speak about this. Plus, I'm writing a book about my life. So talking about this wouldn't be a problem at all.

The first decision I've made was to make my life an open book. Many people are fond of my real life stories, I remember laying in the bed one night, telling myself "It's time to stop hiding." I was hiding my life for a reason. My life has been crazy from the start.

My entire journey of self acceptance regarding my sexuality since the age of two. I grew up with an abusive stepfather physically when I was a kid, and then emotionally and mentally when I was a teenager. My mother has never been the person to admit that she was wrong in many ways. It was her way or an attitude was coming in your direction. Then she became emotionally abusive once I entered my teen years.

My four years of high school was like World War III in record breaking time. Going through relationships, especially with "bad boys" that I will never forget. A paternity test secret. Then how I started taking back control of my life piece by piece. This journey of mine is crazy and it's just starting.

Then the second choice I've made was to be sort of a role model for boys and girls around my age group that are still struggling with their sexuality. I'm eighteen years old, and it's very rare that a boy around my age has fully accepted himself as a gay man, and is doing everything he wants to do in life. That's an important decision that I still intend to keep.

Reading this might make you think I want to have a Zolra Caston reality show. I have to be honest. If my friends or anyone else offered me to do a reality show about my life, I will take the offer without second guessing myself. I want to have a reality show. I want to do talk shows. I want to act, model, write (books, poems, magazines, newspapers, tv and film scripts), spokesman. Since I'm a sports junkie, I would love to do something like Sports Center too.

My friends are always telling me to stick to a specific field of work. Sadly, it just never works out. I'm sorry. Since the beginning of my life, I have never been a boxed person. I always wanted to be involved in multiple projects. This is me and I'm afraid it's not going to change.

I'm sure most people are going to start calling me the Maya Angelou of the LGBT community or the black Augusten Burroughs. I will be surprised if someone actually tell me that.

I know it my appear to be a risky thing. Letting the world know 90% of the things going on in your life. What if you mess up? You're supposed to be positive to them. There is only answer I can give to that question. I don't intend on being positive or negative to everyone. The only thing I count on being for the rest of my life is human.

I hope I wrote this post as honest as I could.

1 comment:

Nathan "Seven" Scott said...

Zolra continue on your quest. You are doing much more than the typical eighteen year old, but then again, you aren't the typical eighteen year old. You are a powerhouse! Keep writing great work.




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