Monday, February 1, 2010

What'll I Do Now That I Am Single - Part 2

Make Me Whole
There are some people that need someone in their life to make them feel whole, why is that? If you need someone with you to fill a void then I suggest some self help techniques to assist in filling this void other than a person, because no one can make you happy with yourself, but yourself. 

I am a very busy individual who loves companionship. I felt as though I wasn’t cut out for a relationship at one point.  Each person that I met ended in disaster and I did not understand why. Then finally my dream came true and I met someone that filled my entire being and I felt whole, my career was on track and so was my love life. Then my partner told me that the relationship felt empty and that I was far too busy for this romance we had created. What do you think I did? Many probably think that I chose the relationship and lived happily ever after. Well I didn’t, I chose to analyze this romance we had created and I saw it was not healthy. 

In relationships there are certain things that should be held high one being time, another being commitment. Our relationship was missing that, I had taken advantage of our union and took it for granted, the reason I chose not to work on fixing what we had was because I wanted to keep this special person in my life as a friend and not someone that I may one day resent, because of sacrificing other things that seemed important to me. Deep down in my heart I believe that our hearts will reconnect when the timing is appropriate. After the split one major thing I noticed was in our time apart I felt like I was incomplete and empty. I felt like I could not function without my lover in my life. Uh oh, I had become dependent; this frightened me and had to figure out what to do. Now you may be saying that this is what you are suppose to have a form of dependence in a relationship and I am not saying that I disagree, but what is wrong with saving this form of dependence for marriage. A relationship that is under 3 years, I believe that it is far too soon to be dependent on another individual. This is one thing that will defiantly end your relationship. How could I depend so heavily on someone I had only been with for less than a year?

So many times in relationships we only think about ourselves once the warranty expires, and one reason we do that is because we are only ready for a relationship with ME, there is that word again you can’t seem to escape it can you. Well I guess because you are only ready to date yourself right now, so let the dating begin. This is the month that we celebrate love, dating, and matters of the heart, so why not start with yourself?

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