I didn't think about this until I ran into a story surrounding a friend of mine who is also a blogger. He was talking about his experiences in New York and one of the things that stood out to me is when he felt like his gaydar was going off consistently. There were men surrounding him on every corner. It was hard for him to turn down one after another. While I was happy for him getting his swerve on, I couldn't help but think about what he told me.
I never really thought about it, but the word gaydar has been in my head for a very long time.
I remember working at this television studio. I was one of the writers hired to write the pilot episode for an upcoming sitcom. I was extremely excited to be on set. It was an amazing experience.
All of a sudden, I remember running into this guy. Let's call him Ben. Ben was the executive producer on the show. So we were hanging out with each other most of the time on set. While we were talking about random things besides the show, I couldn't help but get this weird feeling from him. I wasn't making any assumptions about his sexuality in my head. It was just a minor thought.
His clothing was very casual. He was physically in shape and he never did any over the top body postures. His clothes were tight, but it was mostly because of his muscles. He was very normal. I kept that in my head for three weeks before finally finding out his sexuality. One day, I went back to the set because I forgot the script I was rewriting for next week's episode. While I was walking past the conference room I couldn't help but hear someone getting a little upset. I peaked in and there was Ben complaining.
"I can't believe this," he sighed. "How can he do this?"
"It's alright," said his friend Mike.
"No it's not. I loved him. I really thought he would be an amazing boyfriend. Now I see I was wrong."
It was at that moment that those feelings I had crawling inside were real. Ben was gay without a doubt.
I walked away from that set feeling completely shocked that those senses I had were real. It was like there was a radar in my head telling me that this guy was gay. It was an out of nature conscious that kept vibrating in my brain. That's why I totally related to what my friend in New York was telling me. Now that I had a similar experience with Ben I can't help but wonder.
Do we truly have gaydar?