Anyway, I met this guy on Mochaluv.com, and we connected instantly, sending each other IMs, until we finally exchanged phone numbers. After talking on the telephone for about two weeks, we decided to meet in person. We wanted to see if the connection would be there in person, especially since we had seen one another’s pictures online, and we both liked what we saw.
His name is Joaquin and he was thirty years old when we met. I was twenty-two at the time and had just started going to school for my Master’s degree. He had never been married, and had a teenaged son named Noah, whom he was raising on his own. I had to give it to him; that was very admirable for a man to raise a child by himself. Joaquin was the oldest of three; his younger siblings both women. He grew up in Upper Marlboro and was living in Crofton, where he worked as an office manager part time. He went to school at night, so he could study marine biology during the day. He had a huge aquarium in his home, and it was filled with exotic sea life from everywhere. Joaquin’s father was from the Dominican Republic and his mother African American, a native Washingtonian. He had toasted almond skin and jet black wavy hair. He was a momma’s boy, and he was very accustomed to being by himself. This should have been a red flag for me, but trust me, this didn’t come out until after I was in way over my head. Although he shared with me his desire to one day be married and have more children, he was only saying what he thought I wanted to hear. And he was absolutely right. We stayed together for six years. Many of those years found me just going through the motions.